Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Dear Anonymous

A couple weeks ago a family member emailed me and thanked me for something I had written in a previous post. This took me by surprise. I didn't remember writing what they thanked me for and I didn't know they read my blog. I realized if they were anonymously reading my blog, perhaps there are others.

Any who are reading today and just passing along, please don't feel obligated to announce your presence or leave a comment. I surf blogs. I facebook stalk. I am intrigued by people and their behavior. I enjoy the anonymity offered to me from unlocked facebook profiles and photo albums and many blogs. I hope you enjoy it too.

Friday, August 14, 2009

Home Sweet Home

I've been home since 4am Wednesday. After being in the car for 12 hours from Klamath Falls to Idaho Falls listening to my dad (the self appointed tour guide) explain various areas of countryside I was so ready to be home. After arriving in Idaho Falls at 1am I felt quite compelled to drive the next 3 hours back to Salt Lake. I was wide awake thanks to a strawberry limeade and my ipod shuffling through music that I happily sang along to all the way home. Ok, honestly I belted the tunes out. It was my own personal rock concert. But it was a fun and fast 3 hour drive.

I spent Wednesday in pajamas wandering around the house for various trips to the kitchen for food. Miss Pili stayed by my side all day and slept most every minute of the day. She seemed as tired as I was. Only once Wednesday I left the house, to take Pili to the dog park. I struggled to get her out of the water after an hour of playing.

Thursday and today I spent the afternoons with 2 of my best girl friends. Its nice to be able to laugh and have such enjoyable time with these women every time we get together.

I'm glad to be home. Don't get me wrong, I liked the trip. I saw some amazing countryside and was just in awe and amazement of the beauty I was constantly surrounded by. I spent time with family. I was a nanny. I was a marriage counselor. I was a listening ear for many many hours in a car. I loved spending 7 days having somebody take care of me rather than me having to plan and manage every moment like when I'm home.

Bottom line - I missed my dog. I missed my house. I missed work. I missed Salt Lake. I like my life. I'm very blessed. I doubted that before the trip and considered myself to be missing out, and thought my life was incomplete. Coming home made me remember that my life is complete and fantastic just as it is. And a Friday night with a movie, clean jammies, frozen yogurt, and a chocolate lab snuggled next to me is fine living! Lucky me!!!

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Day 6 - Klamath Falls, Oregon

There was very little driving today and I was loving it! While our drive is in a comfy car and through some fantastically beautiful country, I think my back hates me. Between the car time and motel beds my poor back is in pain. First thing on the list when I'm home is a stop to the chiropractor. Maybe a massage too. ;-)

We met up with my grandmother and aunt today for brunch at a local favorite called Starvin' Marvin's. The food was good. The portions are huge and I had no chance of finishing my order. Carson insisted I order hot cocoa and since it is mid August I thought it was weird, but followed his request. The hot cocoa was good, but I understand why HE loved it so much. The waitress out whipped cream on top of the cocoa and the whipped cream was as tall as the mug itself. And then he got another tower of whipped cream when she came by to refill drinks.

After breakfast we headed out to meet my uncle at the house and let grandma take a nap. Carson, Joel, and Rebekah talked uncle Tom into letting them drive the riding lawnmower. Aunt Mel gave me a tour of the house and took time to fill me in on grandma's health.

I've heard stories about people with dementia and Alzheimer's but I've never seen it firsthand. Today that changed. At breakfast grandma didn't recognize me. Granted, she has had limited exposure to my life thanks to my mom's decisions while I was growing up, but I have tried to keep in contact and visit her regularly for the last 6 years or so. Several times while we were sitting on the patio talking after her nap I had to remind her what we were talking about and remind her who people were that were at the house. Many times she started to talk and the words literally were not there. She sat and thought and my heart just ached as I could see her working hard to tell me what she was thinking. God bless my aunt Mel for dealing with it everyday.

And speaking of aunt Mel let me just say I love being so much like that woman. She reminds me my strong personality is fine. She reminds me to have a style of my own. She is where I get my love of accessories and seltzer water and funky dishes and a love of entertaining. She looks like she could be my mom (I LOVE that I look so much like her and hope I age as she has). She is brave. She loves to laugh. She is full of heart.

We said our goodbyes and I couldn't help but wonder if I'd have another visit with my grandmother and if I did would she be fully unable to communicate or even recognize me.



3 generations: Grandma, Aunt Mel, Rebekah and me




Aunt Mel and me


Monday, August 10, 2009

Day 5 - Crater Lake



We left Eugene this morning heading south on scenic Rogue Highway to Roseburg and then East to Crater Lake. The two lane Rogue Highway drove directly through several national forests. I loved watching the river that ran parallel to the highway twist and flow through the forest. There were many boat launch sites, but I never saw a canoe or raft come down the river.

When we arrived at Crater Lake I saw a National Parks sign. I hadn't realized it was a national park. I decided I'd find out more about Crater than just the obvious - its beautiful blue color.

Here's what I learned:

Crater Lake is on the crest of the Cascade Mountain range, about 100 miles east of the Pacific Ocean. It lies inside a volcanic basin that was created when Mount Mazama collapsed nearly 8,000 years ago after a large eruption.

There are no inlets or outlets to the lake. Generous amounts of winter snow, averaging 533 inches per year, supply the lake with water. Crater Lake is the seventh deepest lake in the world and the deepest in the United States.

After exploring a trail I just sat at the lodge looking into the water. It was so beautiful and serene. If I had been on the trip alone I could have sat all day on the deck of the lodge just watching and pondering into the immensly beautiful lake sitting before me.

We left Crater headed for Klamath Falls where we stopped for the night. My grandmother had a bad day and we're not meeting up with her tonight, but instead tomorrow morning.
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A view of Crater Lake and the little island in the middle which is Wizard Island
Carson, Me, Joel Rebekah



I really wanted more of the Lake in the next 2 pics, but when a ten year old is your photographer I guess you take what you can get.







Saturday, August 8, 2009

Day 4 - Tillamook and Coastal HWY 101

Today's journey began 13 miles outside of Portland. We crossed a section of bridge today that I don't know the name of with a body of water underneath I also don't know the name of. I like driving across bridges. I like being around all this water.

We drove through Portland, but didn't stop until reaching the town of Tillamook which is a farm town that seemed fairly mixed with locals and tourists. It is a quaint town nestled in the Oregon mountains that seems unchanged since the early 1900's.

After visiting Tillamook's Pioneer Museum we headed to a local farmer's market that was on one closed off street. There were approx 20 booths of fresh grown fruits and vegetables and homemade soaps and handmade trinkets. I spent some time sitting on the county office building steps just watching patrons and the vendors noticing a very natural look and style to many of them. Grunge is still alive in Oregon. It is cool to be a hippie here.

Signs allowed leashed dogs into the farmer's market excited me for the potential to pet some of my favorite furry friends. I found a part Labrador, part Newfoundland at one of the booths and he was happy for some extra ear scratching and sweet talking from me. I miss my Pili girl. Tabitha and Timber are taking care of her tomorrow. I texted Tab to ask her to give Pili some extra loves. She assures me they will go visit Pili earlier than planned now.

The road to the Tillamook cheese plant was lined with trees. The two lane highways that exists en route to the plant as well as through much of the country we've seen doesn't seem to scare me. Both sides being full of such beauty seem to erase any of my fears of cars driving off cliffs or drivers deviating into oncoming traffic. I don't seem to tire of seeing all the trees and streams. This view is not getting tiresome at all.

We visited the Tillamook Cheese plant and enjoyed grilled cheese sandwiches made with fresh from the factory cheese of course. The plant also has an ice cream section in their cafe and our group of 7 enjoyed a 38 flavor sampling of Tillamook ice cream.

On the road from Tillamook we mainly stayed on Coastal Highway 101. The roads took us along the cliffs of the Pacific Ocean. I couldn't get enough of the Ocean and think my dad was close to his breaking point with my MANY requests to stop at different overlooks for yet another picture. I love the smell and sight of the Ocean. I miss it. I've got to get to see it more often.

Along the 101 we stopped at Yaquina Head to walk along the shores of the beach and to visit a lighthouse on the edge of the small cove. Thanks to the "Twilight" tour going on this evening no visitors were being allowed to climb the lighthouse stairs. I don't care a bit about the "Twilight" books or movies, but my sister Rebekah does and she informed me that area had quite a bit of filming for the next movie of the trilogy. It would have been nice to climb the lighthouse. I found myself wishing "Twilight" didn't exist when I couldn't explore the lighthouse more.

We drove more along the 101 enjoying the Ocean views until changing to Interstate 5 that brought us to our evening's stop in Eugene. Tomorrow we're visiting Crater Lake followed by Klamath Falls. My paternal grandmother and aunt and uncle are in Klamath.

One more small note (mostly a venting moment for me) - and keep in mind I'm tired. I'm not sleeping well because Rebekah kicks me all night and tosses and turns. I'm stressed from the meeting in Washington, and I've been in the car for LONG hours with other people. Just to blog tonight, I skipped dinner so I could have an hour to myself. I can't get a minute to myself and I'm used to having an unlimited amount of them. Carson wants to play DS when I want to read and my dad can't seem to stop talking in the car. Then there's Joel who is my step mom's 4 year old nephew who is enamored with me and gets Carson or Rebekah to call me (one car away) so he can ask me what I'm doing without him. Family is great. I love my family. I'm loving my trip. However, the two vacation days waiting for me to enjoy upon my return to Salt Lake are unplanned and have no timetable. I'm looking forward to those days - to recover.

Here's some photos:


A self taken shot of Rebekah, Carson, and me before hitting the road for the day



Rebekah with me outside the Tillamook plant


Joel the cow



Carson the cow and Rebekah the farmer


38 flavors of Tillamook ice cream




Joel, me, and Rebekah eating ice cream



My buddies Joel and Carson



Keeping Joel busy at the Cafe



A moment at the ocean


Rebekah, Joel, me and Carson at the Yaquina lighthouse

The lighthouse


Friday, August 7, 2009

Day 3 - On the road to Portland

Not too much to tell from today's travels. The meeting I mentioned yesterday was at 1pm today. It was long and emotionally draining. After the meeting, around 3:30 pm, we headed for Portland.

Our drive went west across the state of Washington and then south into Oregon. The scenery completely changed once we crossed into Oregon. We drove on a highway that bordered the Columbia River and the sun was hiding behind the clouds. Forests of trees lined the opposite side of the highway. You could see the colors of fall in some of the trees. It seems Summer is on its way out in Oregon.

Day 2 - Moses Lake, Washington

Today we were marooned in Moses Lake, Washington which is a small town of approx 15,000 people. The summer sun has dried out the town and green grass is a rare site to see. Tumbleweeds blew past the car while we sat at a stoplight and I couldn't help but feel completely out of my element. I felt very spoiled by all the beauty that surrounds me at home in Salt Lake. I found myself missing the majestic Wasatch mountains today.

Our journey brought us here to visit my sister Cylvia, brother Matthew, and his wife Stephanie and their 3 daughters. Those plans were interrupted due to almost 2 weeks ago Matthew went to jail and his children were taken into custody by child protective services. Tomorrow there is a family meeting with social services and I'll be attending that with my dad. The outcome of that meeting could be life changing for members of my family and my 3 nieces. I'll update as I know more.

We did get a visit from my sister Cylvia tonight. Spending time with her was a challenge. A few weeks ago she shaved her head in support of my nieces who had their heads shaved from having severe lice. Opening the hotel room door to see Cylvia it seemed I didn't recognize her until she spoke. Other than her shaved head life seems to be going well. She is moving to a coastal town this weekend and excited for the change of scenery.

A couple things bothered me from conversation discussed with my sister. It seems a member of the family is living out of their car and has kept it secret for a month now. There is another family member who has a license to grow and sell medical marijuana and that is their sole income.

I often wonder if I was raised by the same people my siblings were how it is that I'm not as dysfunctional as them. My family seems to have a lion's share of dysfunction and somehow I'm a productive, "normal" member of society. I'm grateful. I wish my siblings could also have the awesome, productive, loving life that I have created.

Other than exploring Moses Lake we basically spent the day out of the car and in the hotel. It was nice to not have work deadlines or alarm clocks. I'm enjoying vacation amongst the never ending family drama.

After the meeting tomorrow, we're heading to Portland.

Oh, one more thing - I checked in with Wes and JoAnne and they were in brighter spirits from yesterday. They were able to move in to their apartment today.

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

We interrupt your regularly scheduled blog for a TRAVEL Blog...

I'm on the road and having fun and adventures for the next week. Pardon my regular blog notes for a play by play (as much as I can) of my Pacific Northwest adventures.

Today is Day 1 of my travels. I left Salt Lake headed for Idaho Falls, Idaho to meet up with my dad and step-mom and younger siblings Rebekah and Carson. The first day of travel is just me and my dad. We're heading to Washington for a situation with my brother Matthew and then we're meeting my step-mom and Bekah and Carson in Oregon Saturday.

After a 3 hour drive to Idaho Falls I happily arrived long enough to stretch my legs and load my bags into the car we were taking and then we hit the road.

We headed North from Idaho Falls to Butte, Montana and then west to Missoula, Montana and Spokane Washington and ending in Moses Lake, Washington.

Rural Montana and Idaho are sparsely populated and full of trees. Much of the area is very dry and I imagine in Spring it looks beautifully green. The cities are nestled among the curves of the mountains along with many casinos and truck stops. Many of our fellow travellers were truckers.

My dad likes Flying J for his fuel stops. The first time we stopped at a Flying J I was excited for the "WiFi Available" sign that appeared in the window of the station. Beware that their wifi is not free. I wasn't interested in paying $5 to use the wifi along our journey when I could wait and use it for free at the hotel later that night. Besides, being disconnected from email, internet, and facebook for a whole 9 hours was quite enjoyable.

At about hour 7 of our 9 hours in the car I noticed a sign for Gonzaga University in Spokane. This was exciting to me because my good friend Wes moved to Spokane just yesterday and I had no idea our travels were taking us through Spokane!! He and his wife were so busy before they left that I didn't get a chance to spend time with them before leaving. Realizing I was in their new hometown I called Wes and after explaining why I was 5 miles from him we met up with him and JoAnne.

It was great to see them and welcome them to their new home! Small problem though - their apartment wasn't ready so they were spending the night at a motel. Wes explained he had filled out all the paperwork and been in contact with the apartments several times before the move. He was a bit frustrated and seemed relieved and confused to be telling me this face to face. Hopefully they can get into their apartment tomorrow and get the UHAUL unpacked by the time its due. And I hope for them that all this chaos in the beginning only means the next 3 years of Wes' law school will be smooth sailing!!

I took a couple pictures with Wes and JoAnne and said the "see you laters" we didn't get to have before they left Utah and then I headed into the sunset to the evening's destination of Moses Lake.